Tea gone cold is rank

Saturday morning and my tea has gone cold. I've been putzing around my apartment getting ready to go out but I have another hour before I need to be out the door. I thought I would sit here and write a bit. I woke up last night with a killer migraine...as much as a love a decent glass of Savignon Blanc, it did not love me back. Ever since I started my restrictive diet, any time I allow myself  bit of alcohol: 1. I get tipsy much faster; 2. the migraine comes on faster too. Sigh. The question then becomes can I give up alcohol? Full stop. Hmm. One to ponder.

I don't really have anything clever to write at the moment. My day job has been super stressful with an upcoming large meeting. I am handling a portion of the logistics and my brain refuses to turn off. I've been journaling but not enough of the work is creative. Definitely missing that portion of my life. Once I get through this next week, I'll have some breathing room to get some of my own work done. This week will be 12 hour days, going home and crashing. That's as much as I'll be able to muster. Somewhere in there I need to see about getting a workout or two in. Really, I should have gone to the gym earlier this morning but I got up to finish up a recipe instead.

Somewhere in there...I also have to finish Christmas shopping. My nieces are done. They are always first on my list. I also have to buy paper and boxes to wrap gifts. I have ideas on what to get the rest of my family. Eesh!  I'm hoping to have it done by the first week in December. Then a much needed holiday vacation in Texas with my folks. Yay!  Wish me luck~
Lily


All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Bill Joel in Concert - Madison Square Garden

Glass Houses Album Cover - Billy Joel

I went to see Billy Joel play in Madison Square Garden.  What a terrific show!! I grew up with his music and his songs take me back. The Glass Houses album was one of the first albums I asked, begged, pleaded my dad to buy for me. Thank goodness he caved. His songs remind me of Saturdays belting along while cleaning the house and dancing around with my sisters like lunatics. It was crazy fun.

Billy Joel had a couple of surprise musical guests....but I lost my mind when Joe Perry from Aerosmith walked out and played guitar.  He played Walk This Way...and one of Billy Joel back up singers sang it out...and I couldn't contain myself. My rocker chick self was singing along and loving the shred of the guitar. LOVED IT!!!

When Bill Joel sang Piano Man towards the end of the show...my heart expanded. The tears welled up and I was fighting against letting them fall because I didn't want my mascara to run...but the song won out.  I know this is the first blog posting in quite some time but Billy Joel is oh so worth it.  Enjoy.

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Rozzi - Never Over You

I love this woman's voice.!!  Enjoy!

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Ashley McBryde - Girl Goin' Nowhere

One more to share. Love how genuine she sings her song.

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

James Bay - Us

I've gone to mush listening to this song. You'll understand why when you hear it. 

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Alice Merton - No Roots

My latest musical obsession. I can't stop listening to this song.  Enjoy!

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Sunday morning

I know, I know..it's been awhile. C'est la vie. I went to Paris for a long weekend in March and I think a part of me stayed there. It's been difficult getting back into the swing of my life. I've been super stressed out over work, friends, family, career and my writing.  It's strange. Sometimes the fit of my life is a bit too tight and I can't breathe. This past week I've been plagued with migraines. A full week of low grade migraines which meant I was functional and at work even with the pain. Then Thursday the full blown one came crashing down and had me out for the count. On Friday, I was a bit of a zombie but functional and then Saturday was another full blown migraine again. A rebound migraine. What crap. Today I feel a bit more awake but I can feel the muscles and bones beneath my skin in my face. It's a odd thing to be hyper aware of the spaces that were in pain all week. There is a dull, throb in my head but it's so dull I wouldn't even call it pain.
One of my sisters is coming over and I'm cooking up some brunch for us. Spicy chorizo with scrambled eggs and mashed black beans. It's the first day in four days that I actually have an appetite so I can't wait. In the meantime, I am sipping on a large mug of Earl Grey tea. All for now...
Lily~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Submission sent

It's amazing how fast time flies when hyper-focused on a task. I left work 30 minutes early to work on my Application/Submission at home. I went through the play a final time, fixed typos, changed a line or two but really kept revision to a minimum and uploaded the draft, my resume, artistic statement, references and short bio. Phew!  It's done, it's out, auto-notification indicating its been received. On to the next thing.

Now I can focus on the short story deadline coming up in 5 weeks.  Eek! Now all I have to do is write a story for it. :-p

Peace,
Lily

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Success!!

I have reached my minimum page count today. Woohoo! I'm not saying this draft is a masterpiece but I have no problem submitting this play for this application deadline. I won't lie, I am a little surprised. My muse showed up and we started at 9:30 am on this rainy Sunday morning. By noon, I crossed the 10 page mark.

Afterwards, I worked on the artist statement and a resume. I sent the draft to the people who will be my references and my sisters. I told every one to be gentle in their feedback because its the first play I've written in a while.  By 3:30 pm I was done for the day.

I haven't yet submitted all the elements to the application BUT I'll do it Monday night after work. I want to give the whole project one last pass before I submit it.  I rewarded myself with a couple of episodes of Stranger Things season 2. Yay!

Peace,

L~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

A Solid Fifty Pages

I spent the day writing today, even with a bloody migraine.  Even with my sister stopping by with pizza and wanting to watch Stranger Things.  Man! Am I enjoying that series.  But I digress. I spent the morning writing before she got here. Then after she left, I spent the evening writing about 6.5 hours total.  I am up to 50 pages. I have 10 pages left to hit my minimum page count. I am well aware that this is a first draft. That I want to develop the piece out, flesh out the characters, delve a bit deeper...but it has good bones. At least, I hope it does.

My muse was chomping at the bit today but she grew tired when I hit 10:30 pm. She gave a big yawn and she told me to run along, we would do more tomorrow.  Then she drew her shade down around her chaise lounge and fell into a deep sleep. I'll let her rest for now...I hope she'll be able to manage a bit more tomorrow morning so I can finish this draft. Thursday is the deadline. Eek! Okay, the fear is starting to set in so I'm going to sign off before that beast is fed. 

Feel the fear and write anyway. 
Peace,
L~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Blue October - I Hope You're Happy

A little rock to go with my rhythm and blues. Enjoy!

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

I need a break...

You ever had one of those really shitty days at work where you start questioning your existence on this planet? Seriously!  What's the point of it all really? There has got to be a better way.  A better way of making ends meet. A better way of living a life worth living. A better way of having more time for the things I want to be doing instead of waiting until I retire in order to do them. Good g*d d**n, tonight I want something more, something different, something other than what I have at this present moment. I'm not being ungrateful. I'm just pissed off at where I am, what I'm doing, f**k sake take me off this mindless hamster wheel.

I've decided to stop swimming against the current and I'm taking myself out of the river altogether. I need to sit in quiet contemplation to calm my s**t down and find a new opportunity or create the kind of opportunity I want in my life. It might be time for me to pull up roots and start a new chapter somewhere else because this just isn't working for me tonight.

Rant over...I'm hiding under my duvet until I have a better reason to get out of bed other than my stupid day job.  Peace~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Muse on Snooze

Today, I was unable to hit my 15-page quota, my muse hit the snooze button on me.  I managed eight pages and hit a bit of a wall. As I was writing, I was hit with a big wave of emotion. There I was typing and crying through the scene. Yes, the scene actually made me cry. Big tears streaming down my face, while tip-tapping on my keyboard. And then it stopped. Just like that. Both the emotion and the words...stopped. Screeching halt. Completely blank. I thought I could force the continuation of the scene even without the emotion but then I felt like I was slogging through the scene, trying to force the words, trying to force the scene and neither worked. Bummer! I tried to go back and figure out where it went pear-shaped but I couldn't figure out what line/what made the words stop. I took a deep breath and left it there.  Sometimes you just have to know when to let go. 

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Muse - part deux

Day two: My muse was hard at work writing every line today.  I managed to get most of it down.  I'll need to read it back eventually but not yet. Today my muse gave me eighteen pages.  I thought I would try for 30 pages but my creaky back won't cooperate.  I left a note to myself on the last line of what might be next but that might change between now and when I wake up tomorrow morning.

I'm also trying to line up some references for this application. I'm hoping that I'll hear back on Monday if I can use their names/contact. I'm hopped up on the flow of creative juices.  I'm not sure what to do next but feeling very satisfied with my progress.  Ooo did I just jinx myself.  Nah! I'm good.  I'm going to make myself some Earl Grey Tea and break open one of the new books I've bought last night. I need something light and refreshing to cleanse the palate.  Not sure if I have a book title that fits the bill quite yet.

Last thing I wanted to mention: I had a dream that I had a porcupine resting in my arms and I was petting it's quills. At one point, the porcupine began to let go of its quills because it didn't want to be in my arms anymore. But I kept him in place, passing my hand over it's quills. It was important to keep him in my arms to pet him. Don't ask me why...it was a strange dream. Anyway, the quills would enter the flesh of my arms creating this sharp sensation of pain and pleasure. At one point I had one of the quills under my chin and when I yanked it, the barbed effect of the quill ripped the flesh into a bigger wound.  I woke up with a start, touching my chin and arms to see if any quills were left behind. Hmmm. Interesting, right?

Okay, that's all I have for tonight. With a curtsy I bid you adieu.

L~


All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Muse at Full Alert

It's an overcast day on this cold Saturday afternoon in February.  Brrr. I'm sitting at my desk and I showed up to the page today.  What does that mean? I have a deadline and instead of watching tv or cleaning, I chose to write. Full on. I spent the morning writing and came out with quite a few pages. I won't attach a value to it...good, bad, shitty first draft. Instead, I'm grateful for the quiet space to be able to get it done.

I'm working on a play. I'm trying to get a playwriting fellowship with a theater. This piece that I need to submit has to be 60 pages.  And it's due on March 1st. Yesterday I wrote 1.5 pages at work when I had a quiet moment. I emailed the words to my personal account and opened up that bad boy this morning and went to town.  I managed 14 pages today.  I'm glad the submission does not have to be a finished product otherwise I would have found every excuse under the sun not to even try.

Perhaps these deadlines help get me out of my stalling tactics. Now I'm in a straight up panic, writing as quickly as i can to get the idea down before my muse decides to flee the scene. Poor thing.  She's been so neglected for so long that she's like a starving artist coming up to a feast.  She wants me to keep writing but I need a break. I spent five hours working and now I need to take a long walk in the city to get my blood circulating again.

Just needed to write this quick entry first. All for now.
Peace,
L~


All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Sunday afternoon in February

Let's see I've spent the day writing.  I've needed to work on a new scene/play for an upcoming deadline and I found that I have nothing to say. Isn't that strange? Me? Not have anything to say?  Seriously?  I didn't get anywhere with that piece.

I also worked on a couple of poetry pieces. I have one hanging in the draft mode on this blog. Not ready to pull the trigger on it yet. However, I did submit some new poetry pieces to an online magazine. I guess that's something right?

I've had the apartment to myself and I like the ability to stretch out without my roommate around.

I am sitting at my desk, sipping a big cup of hot earl grey tea, a small desk light on, looking out the window. The day is grey and dim but I'm feeling at peace with the world today. I'm listening to James Bay playing in the background.  Someone snap a pic, quick. It's def worth making a note here about it. Since most days I'm full of angst and worries over not getting enough writing done. Today, I am not. :-)  Time to go finish a journal entry and then dinner.  OM!
L~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

walking backwards

searching out thin fleeting

thought, chasing rabbits down

slippery holes, grasping web

lines to piece together some

semblance of rational thought

painkillers dull the brain, making

zombies out of creative souls

who's knocking on the door

has anybody seen where all

the wasted love has gone, be

careful with sharp edges

marks of canine and cat

etched into bone marrow,

long jagged marks sit beneath

the skin, pretend you never

loved anyone else once upon

a time, blame the happily ever

after its gone sour, another

midnight hour, we were blind

lovers grasping for each other

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Rozzi Crane - Uphill Battle

This young woman's voice gives me chills. Rozzi Crane just came out with a new song, check it out.  She is def. worth the listen.  I haven't stopped listening....enjoy. L~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

you got me going

i want to share with you something more, a line, a word, a turn of phrase that reminds you of me, of a time long ago, of the time when we were glad to see each other, the time before the storms, or being in the midst of one together, we were thunder and lighting rattling the windows down, no one believes me when i speak of you, they thought you were a figment of my imagination, so let it be, let that time be just mine, and yours, just for me, just for you, behind closed doors and shuttered windows, enclosed in a space of just us, no one understands, no one was really supposed to, we were only for each other, only for a time, and in that moment...that moment was forever.


All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Tuesday Tidbit

A rainstorm unfolded on this Tuesday morning. My sister saw lightning, I did not. I love watching the way the sky changes. By the end of the day, the sun cut through the cloud cover, lit up oranges and yellows leaving the gray underside of the clouds awash in blue and purple hues. I didn't try to capture a pic, instead I took it in for a good long while.


All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Elusive

I've collected quarters to call you.
How many will it take to reach you?
The slivered moon presses down
against the night sky. A song chased
down a hollow throat, lost. Piano
notes heard through the wall.
I have nothing left to show you.
Empty hands fill deep coat pockets.
Seams are torn Winter wind seeps in.
Knuckles chafed raw bleed thinly.
Did we forget our lesson when you
looked right through me? She never
liked questions in my poetry, red lines
across my question marks. A large white
swan in a multi-colored vest chased me
across a yard in my dream last night.
You've caught me sober. Don't drown
in your secrets. You've left snowy
footsteps across the floor. Let them
dry. A reminder that you were here once. 

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Hello Out There...Is This Mic On?

It's been awhile since I last wrote on this blog. I could make up all sorts of excuses but I'll spare you the list of reasons. Let's start with a clean slate, shall we?  It's been ten years since I started this web log. As I write these words, I keep stopping to take inventory on what I want to write next. I have the song Girl Crush by Little Big Town playing in the background. It's a simple song but it makes me ache. It reminds me that this cold dead heart of mine still has a little life in her yet.

It's been raining and snowing on this cold January day and I've been home with a bit of a migraine. Darn thing sneaks up on me sometimes. Oh wait...Sade is playing now...nope, can't listen to her tonight. I've changed it over to Sam Smith's, Stay With Me.

What have I been up to?  Let's see, I'm working on an application for a Fiction grant.  Ergh. Deadline is next week and I'm almost done with the package.  All I have left to do is upload the materials to the site. I can't do it today because migraines leave me loopy and I always make the oddest mistakes. I'm holding off until I'm a bit more clear headed. Tomorrow might be a better day.

I think I wrote about my escapist fantasies late last year and it keeps popping up for me.  The one where I cash out my 401K and go traveling. Of course, I start thinking about the "stuff" in my apartment and I think, could I do it?  Could I really pick up my life and go exploring? My gypsy soul is definitely singing that tune. I know what it is...it's a real visceral need to shake up my life.  I get too comfortable and I want MORE...I want something else...I want to FEEL something more. Instead of living this lukewarm existence.

Let's see...I've booked my airline ticket and hotel to Paris. I've wanted to go to France since I was 16 years old. Even the thought of the trip has me doing cartwheels in my head. Haha. See...that's what happens when I start thinking of traveling....it's my happy place.

Here are some of my most recent recommendations:
Music:  I'm still obsessed with Johnnyswim.  I went to hear them play last month and they were fantastic live.

Movie: Shape of Water by Guillermo Del Toro

Sci-fi show: Travelers on Netflix

Books:  I've read a slew of books on my hiatus but the best one had to be The Reader by Bernhard Schlink. The story stayed with me long after I put that book down.

That's all for now, I will write more soon.
Peace,
L~

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All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2018 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Amalfi Coast - October 2017