Word Count is Kicking My A**

Let's start off with word count update.  That seems to be all I have eyes for these days even though I've had two very slow days. 
On Tuesday: 513 words
On Wednesday: 824 words
Total word count to date: 8,497 words

I'm trying not to be too hard on myself for not meeting at least 1,600 words for each of those days. I'm trying to think bigger picture.  What I find interesting about this process is that my sucky mood on Tuesday left me fighting even with my own writing.  The story wanted to go one way and I didn't want to go in that particular direction so the words stopped coming out. Hmph!  So we were at an impasse and we sat there staring at each other.  My story didn't blink and I backed away for the night. 

Then last night, I told myself to let the story go wherever it wanted to go and I managed to eke out 800 more words. But then the story bucked up once again and it wanted to go in a direction that I didn't think was very believeable. Ergh! I was fighting with it again.  I deleted words and then I reminded myself that I was going to allow the story to go where it wanted to go and it didn't matter if I believed  it or not.  I needed to give the story space to breathe so then I retyped those last couple of sentences again and waited.  Now that it was going into unknown country I was going to follow its lead.  I could feel myself reaching out trying to figure out what next? The words wouldn't come...hell, I was staring at a blank screen, literally and figuratively.  I stayed in place.  Just sat there and waited for 15 more minutes.  I've even stopped tweezing, I realized that I was in danger of tweezing all my eyebrows off and then I would have to paint eyebrows on every morning.  Hehehe.  I called it a night after writing for an hour and waiting for more those empty 15 minutes. 

Oh yes, I wanted to share this tidbit.  I hopped on the scale this morning and it gave me a number I didn't quite believe. I dropped another three lbs.  Despite what the scale is indicating, I almost don't want to take it at face value. I got off and on three times to make sure that my scale wasn't broken or wrong. My weight has been up and down all week but the weight I write down is Thursday's weight. Something I learned from my Weight Watcher days because weight fluctuates depending on meals, water retention, etc.  My total weight loss to date is 25.5 lbs. Holy Fucking Hell!! I am entering Week 15 of my Healthy Lifestyle changes and I am reminding myself to curb the sweet drinks.  I've allowed myself a couple of sodas this week when I was feeling crappy but seeing the scale on it's downward trajectory is getting me back on track.  Hoorah!!
Doing a little happy dance!

Peace,

L~
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