The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

I am in a mood today.  Not sure where it's coming from or what's bothering me at the moment, but I'm in a bit of a snit.  The thing is I don't have anything to complain about at the moment.  I've addressed some issues that have popped up (for a change, instead of letting them fester), I've reached out to friends for support and advise (check), cooked healthy foods for myself (check), taken walks to clear my head (check).  So where is the funky stink mood coming from?  Ergh!! 
 
I've tried some retail therapy but that hasn't work out lately.  I've bought three pairs of shoes in the last three months only to return them as soon as I get them home.  My flat Sasquash feet don't fit into anything pretty.  And since I'm not 20 anymore...wearing dr. marten's with dresses just doesn't look right. *sigh* 

I've lost 16 lbs up until last week and today I'm back up 3 lbs...*frustrating*  My sister says she can see the weight loss...unfortunately, I don't.  * grumble, grumble *

I have an idea for another story about desire and obsession.  Last night, I sat down at my desk to quickly sketch out the story.  It was just to get down the overall idea. But somewhere between sketching out the idea, my direction changed and I was trying to block out the story and the writing was just terrible.  Big clunky phrasing that reminded me of undergraduate work. I balled everything up and threw it out.  I'll have to go back tonight and fish it out of the wastepaper basket...in hopes of salvaging the idea itself.  I'm frustrated with writing lately.  It's like holding a finger down on a bruise.  It hurts but I can't help but do it, write, that is.  I know there are hills and valleys to my process...just sometimes wish there were more peaks than troughs.  Maybe that is where the mood is coming from...wanting the writing to be better than what it is currently. 

On the bright side, today is Friday.  I'm having dinner with my sister and her boyfriend at one of our favorite Korean restaurants.  Yummy Kimchi and Dolsot BiBamBop, can't wait.  I think I'll walk around Bryant Park a couple of times during my lunch break to help with the funky mood.  It's a warm, bright day...I may as well take it in before winter sets in.  
I'm not in the mood to work (day job) today. Instead, I just want to pile everything up in the corner of my desk and try my hand at that story again.  See if I can piece together the impulse with the act of writing. Wish me luck. 

All for now,

L~

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2012 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

Lianne La Havas at The Bowery Ballroom (Sep 11, 2012)

I went to see the Lianne La Havas last night at The Bowery Ballroom and she was phenomenal!! I loved her vibe and the way she flirted with her audience. She wore a black velvet bolero jacket with gold thread and a short leather skirt with black platform shoes. I was up in the balcony…yay! so I could actually see her act without getting squished. The music was sensational and listening to her live actually made me well up with an abundance of soppy emotions. The sadder the ballad, the bigger the well-up of tears yet it was cathartic. There were a few songs where the audience sang along with her and the energy could barely be contained in the place. There was a couple of audience members right in front of the stage that was jamming and grooving so hard…that their energy was infectious. Her last song of the night was Is Your Love Big Enough. Hoorah! Last but not least, her band mates were on point. Her drummer is fierce. After the concert, I walked up along the Bowery, and the street was dark and the night was cool and I had her music inside of me. I hummed all the way to the train station in a low mellow way and it was a gorgeous night. Lovely!!

All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2012 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.

And now back to our regularly scheduled program

Dark heavy clouds skim across the horizon.
Damp wind on a warm day does not soothe
Instead it leaves behind an oily film on one’s skin.

Anyway, I spent the weekend with family and friends having good food and decent wine. Very chilled out indeed. Of course there is always a bit of drama but for now we will forgo details since they are not mine to share...or better yet they can be used against us in a court of law. (teehee).

Moving on, went to see this really sweet and charming indie movie called Robot and Frank.  I have to admit if there is a tiny bit of sci-fi element to a movie, I want to see it. I strong-armed a friend to come with...promising a pitcher of sangria. Robot and Frank is written by Christopher Ford and directed by Jake Schreier. This movie surprised me, the humor in it was so right on that I laughed out loud quite a few times. It also has a big beating heart right smack in the middle of it that brought up a few tears up. Frank Langella and Susan Sarandon were marvelous...and it has a tiny twist that I just wasn’t expecting that raised the human element of it. Lovely. This is a debut project for both writer and director and I can’t wait to see more from them.

I finished Highsmith’s novel Deep Water, it was so intense that I had a hard time putting the book down for the last couple of chapters. I had to sneak off on tiny breaks, at work, because I wanted to know what happened next. The story was haunting and cruel. I was going to jump into yet another novel but opted instead to read Andrew Wilson’s biography on Highsmith, Beautiful Shadow. Reading about her life and her creative process both inspires me and haunts me at the same time. She wrote about herself and her work with the same impatience that I have for my own. In reading excerpt passages from her diaries, Highsmith feels like a kindred spirit. She was a voracious reader with a keen intellect who looked upon the human condition as fodder for her novels, especially when dealing with deviant behavior. She was also vastly unhappy, emotionally removed and seeking more than just peace. I am barely 100 pages into the biography and her impatience has fired up my own desperation for more time to work on my novel. Funny how that works.

All for now...skipping off to take a walk around Bryant Park.  It's a nice break to clear the cobwebs. 

Peace,

L~
All artwork, photos, and text © Copyright 2008-2012 Liliana Almendarez unless indicated otherwise. All Rights Reserved. Any downloading, copying or use of images on this website is strictly prohibited without express written consent by Liliana Almendarez.